Many times through various seasons of my life, the voices of my loved ones were calling out to me in the wilderness of my emotions as I circled around the same issues and same people over and over again.
They were voices of reason reminding me to calm down in the midst of my emotions that were suddenly triggered. But, how does one calm down when every sense in your body is reacting?
I have learned the hard way, when unchecked, emotions send us whirling into bad decisions that often create more havoc, confusion and damage in our personal lives. It’s never about the other person. It’s about you and your emotional well-being.
Because of this during times of emotional turmoil, I decide to practice the 48 hour rule that I recently read about. The 48 hour rule puts you in a timeout, gives you space to settle down and allows you to re-evaluate the circumstances once your emotions have calmed.
During this two-day period, I don’t make any decisions, send reactionary emails or texts, or negatively respond in any way to the circumstances.
Recently, I was triggered by two separate situations in my life. Just when I had matters under control, I found myself triggered by another situation. So, my wise and caring husband, who I had appointed as my referee, said, “ I think you need to go into another ’48 hour’ timeout,” and I did.
I ended up in three back-to-back time outs, in other words, six days of time outs to diffuse my emotions that were ready to explode. I desperately needed to create space between myself, the people and circumstances triggering me.
As women, we tend to act like our body is not attached to our head and ignore the signals that say that it’s time for a “timeout.” We need to learn that these issues are mostly about us and our emotional reactions.
Give yourself space between you and the other person or the circumstances triggering you.
The Apostle Paul writes:
7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:7 NASV)
We need the peace of God to guard our hearts. We need the peace of God to provide the understanding on how to deal with difficult situations and when our hearts are emotionally triggered is not the time to make a decision. The Holy Spirit wants to guard our hearts.
When we find our emotions raging, there is no peace so we need to step back and allow the Holy Spirit to calm us.
Create a safe parameter around your body and mind, slow down and disengage from the explosive emotions triggering you. Stop and take a deep breath.
I literally created a bubble of peace around myself for 48 hours where I kept out the irrational thoughts and allowed the peace of God to encompass me. It was freeing to disengage from the negative emotions whirling inside me.
By giving myself 48 hours I was able to peacefully resolve these matters with myself and entrust them to my Father God who cares deeply about my mental, emotional and physical well-being.
In other words, rather than making rash decisions put yourself into a timeout and if your find yourself triggered again give yourself another 48 hours.
Give yourself space to disconnect from your emotions, enabling to you to reconnect with the Holy Spirit and His peace.