Emotional health, Main, Women, z172
Comment 1

What being easily offended says about you


The writer of Proverbs describes a person, who is not easily offended by what others say about them, as being a person of glory:

A man’s discretion makes him slow to anger,
And it is his glory to overlook a transgression. (Proverbs 19:11)

Notice how the writer says that it is a person’s glory to overlook a transgression. In other words, the ability to overlook an offence says a lot about who you are.

According to Terri Cole, my favourite on-line therapist, being offended is an ego response to what someone says to you or about you.

You cannot control what others say or think about you. What matters is what you think in your heart about you!

Being easily offended, means you are allowing others to define who you are. When you get offended by what they say, you are giving their words more importance than what you think about yourself or what God says about you.

Cole says an ego-offended state also perpetuates a victim mentality which disempowers you and redirects your focus off the important things in your life. 

When offensive things are said, you need to be honest that these statements hurt, but you can’t allow yourself to stay in an ego-offended state. It infects relationships and takes you off course where you become distracted by the offence and get stuck in a poor-me, victim-mentality. 

Being offended says I have so little confidence in who I am in God, that I can be unnerved by what others say. Being easily offended means you don’t value yourself.

My value is not determined by someone’s actions or words, it’s determined by God and my choice to embrace who I am in Christ. That is my glory.

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