All posts tagged: surrender to God

Credit: Mik/Flickr/Creative Commons

Waves of surrender

As, I stood on a beach in Mexico recently with my daughter, the waves caught my attention. Over the past few weeks, I wrestled with some things in my mind that mostly involved expectations I had placed on myself. These expectations kept me awake at night and anxious during the day. I sat down in the warm ocean water leaned back on the sandy shoreline and allowed the waves to crash over me. I watched the waves rise, gain momentum and then fall. The strength of the waves kept building and some were four to five feet high. I plugged my nose, held my breath and braced myself as the next wave rolled over me, pushing me further back onto the shore. The sand massaged my body as I sank deeper and deeper into it’s wet but warm embrace. It was so comforting! In those moments, I released the expectations I had placed on myself. I let go of them as the waves rolled over me.  I had placed expectations on myself of things I …

Flamenco dance, Seville, Spain Credit: Laurence Vagner/Flickr/Creative Commons

The Dance of Life

Español: La Danza de la Vida These past few weeks my eyes have been opened to my need for love, respect and acceptance from others. I tend to accuse others of being uncaring when they dismiss my plans and ideas. I demand from others what I am lacking in myself and make others responsible for the way I feel. When I quit blaming others for the way I am feeling (angry, hurt, rejected), only then can I see what the real problem is — my lack of self-esteem mostly. I needed to ask ‘why’ am I blaming someone else for my lack of self-worth and insecurities. Why do I so badly need to be right? Resentment and anger are dis-empowering. They debilitate and cripple us, yet we unknowingly lean on them like crutches to get the emotional support and love that we so badly need. When we seek love without giving it to ourselves first, (embracing our value and worth in God and believing that) we will never be satisfied with what we get from people.  …