All posts tagged: avoid toxic friends

Should We Shun Other People?

Years ago, when I was a younger and single man, I joined a singles group in my church. We were a friendly bunch, and one day a new member told us what was really bothering her. She had a terrible problem that would not go away, and her life was ruined. She was being shunned. Shunning means that someone is cut off from their community, and in extreme cases, all of their friends and neighbors refuse to speak to them or do business with them. If this sounds odd to you, we didn’t get it either. Being shallow city kids, we could find new friends, and we liked being free from rude and controlling people. And we could sleep in on Sunday. If we were shunned, we would need time to notice that someone had disappeared from our busy lives, and then we could decide if this was a problem or an opportunity. We were shallow. It took us some time to know that our friend was hurting. She had lived in a small town …

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Just Don’t Drink the Poison

“We teach people how to treat us.” (Dr Phil) Toxic people are everywhere, and one of them will find you if you give them a chance. They range from overbearing parents or others in the family who know how we should live our lives, to addicts and alcoholics, and sometimes to violent abusers. You might have heard words like this “You make me like this, it’s your fault.” or “I drink because of you.” or “I only lose my temper when you …” RELATED: Cut toxic people out of your life says Christian psychiatrist: Christian Today In my extended family, I have a cousin who came under the control of an abusive man. She tells this story in churches, and this is my summary. As a young woman, I think a teenager, she met an older man and then moved in with him. They never did marry and she was a Christian. After some time, she realized that the man was controlling and abusive, and she needed to get out. One day they had a …